Monday, February 27, 2017


     People are always shyed away from Christianity by the idea of submission. Women especially, because they are supposed to submit to God and their husbands.
     Women think that submitting to their husbands makes them weak. They think somehow it makes them worth less than their husbands.
     No one likes the idea of submitting to God. No one likes to think they aren't in control of their circumstances.
     All these issues with submission are trust issues. Women are afraid their husbands will abuse their power and look down on them. Women want to be seen as equals. Women may also not want to be a traditional housewife. Many women think that is part of submitting to a husband. But, this is misinformation. Submission is about a role and a mindset. Women are supposed to fufill the role of supporter to their husbands. How each husband needs supported depends on the man. For example, my husband and I decided to work to be debt free. My husband controls the money. But we both know our budget. However, recently he suggested we reduce our bills by cutting back our internet and changing insurance. I had to give up some online entertainment. I could have threw a fit and demanded we keep our current plan. But I submitted to his will because I trust him. I know he wants us debt free. Submission is a mindset that accepts someone's will for your life because you trust them.
     Trusting God's will for your life is harder. As a non-believer it is hard to trust someone you've never known. Even Christians can stop trusting God when life circumstances are difficult. When things are difficult we want to feel in control of our lives. Control makes us feel as if we can change our circumstances for the better. But we are supposed to SURRENDER control to God. We are supposed to trust that He has plans for us that are greater than we can imagine. Often He will not only lead us out of bad circumstances but use the sitiation to bring good into our lives.
     Trust really boils down to faith. Do you have faith in your spouse? As non-believer, you have to ask yourself if you believe that Jesus gave his life for you. If so, can you believe that same person would help you through your circumstances? If He would die for you, surely He would heal you. Or help you out of an abusive relationship. Or provide you a home. Or help restore your marriage.
     If you can trust your spouse, and God, you can submit to their will. It doesn't make you weak to be submissive. It makes you smart and strong!

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Luck and Fate vs. Blessing and Purpose

     Lots of people, Christians and non-Christians, believe in luck. Many also believe in fate. I don't believe in luck or the standard definition of fate. Luck happens because you did something right or wrong. Like rubbing a rabbit's foot or walking under a ladder. Sometimes luck happens for reasons that can't be explained. Luck is something you can't control. It can be either good or bad. It's something you have to hope for and also something to fear. Fate is defined as events beyond a person's control that are destined to turn out a certain way. It depends on who you ask as to who determines our fate. Some people believe that there are three goddesses called the fates who decide the fate of all humans. Some people believe that fate is determined by some cosmic balance. Some people believe that God determines our fate. Everyone, no matter who they think is in control, believes that we cannot know or change our fate. The inability to determine our fate frightens people. So people who believe in luck and fate, live in fear.
     However, there are a select group of people who live in not fear but peace. This is a select group of Christians that have truly come to know God. You see, I believe that fate is determined by God but not in the way most people think. I believe that God has a divine purpose for our lives. What I mean by that is that God has given each person a task to fulfill during their time on Earth. He gave each person talents and abilities in order to help us complete that task. He put us in families that shape the people we become. He brings people into our lives to help us complete this task. He blesses us with the things we need to complete our task. This designing of our lives and bringing us people and resources necessary to fulfill our purpose in life, is what I call fate. If you are going to fulfill a purpose or achieve a task, you have to know what it is you are going to do. In this way, my definition of fate differs from the standard definition. I think of God's control of my fate with this analogy: Our lives are a beautiful symphony. God is the author of that symphony and the conductor. You and all the people close to you are the musicians. You are playing an instrument. That instrument is your gifts and abilities given to you by God. You have been given a solo to play during the symphony. But there are also parts you play in conjunction with the other musicians.
     Luck has no place in a life lived with God. One reason we don't need luck is because we have been promised provision. God gives us everything we need to fulfill our purpose and blesses us with even more. God promises us a life of abundance! But the other reason not to believe in luck but instead in blessing, is because it is a life without fear. Since blessing comes from God you know that it will always be good. So instead of fear you can live in peace.
     Still even with God in control people can feel hesitant to let someone else control their fate. This is an issue of trust. Maybe you would not let your next door neighbor, Sue, write and conduct your symphony. But this is God! Given His omnipotence and love for us, I think we can trust Him!
     So my hope is that, number one, people would chose a life with God. Two, that they would come to know God in a way that they would understand my definition of fate. Three, that they would chose to live a life based on purpose and blessing rather than luck and fear. Four, that they would find their God given purpose and fulfill it. I believe this would bless them and so many others. I believe it would truly change the world!

Saturday, November 21, 2015

I Call The Shots!

          I saw this toddler shirt at a retail store that said, "I Call The Shots!" At first I thought it was funny and laughed. But as I thought about it I came to dislike the shirt and what it represents.
          Babies are cute and we want to give them anything/everything. We want our children to live better lives than we did. Children bat their eyelashes and we want to buy them the toy that they saw in the store. I understand this shirt is talking about that feeling. I get that the role reversal is supposed to be funny.
          But as I thought about the shirt, I thought about the children I saw in the store. Some were running through the store playing tag. The parents said nothing. Some were demanding certain clothes just because they had some character on them. Boys and girls were shopping in men's and ladies because they were so fat. The children went to try on the clothes and the parents were making excuses for their child being fat. One child was demanding a new bed set. Her sister was old enough to not want one with princesses on it anymore. So this other kid was screaming that if her sister got a new one, then she better get one too!
           Hello! Why does one kid getting something mean you should too!? Why are all these parents ok with their children being fat!? Why is a kid demanding anything!? Why aren't parents keeping their children from running around the store like it's their front yard!? If I had ran around like that in a store as a kid my mom would have put me in a death grip, talked to me through gritted teeth, and warned me about dad and his belt! I am not even saying spank your kids. I am just saying, "BE A PARENT!"
          When did the roles really swap!? Why are kids calling the shots!? When did parents stop teaching their children discipline and respect!? Do we really want to buy our kids a shirt that makes them think this thoughts process is ok!? Or do we want to be good parents and teach our children how to respect others!? Or maybe it's just a shirt and I am overreacting...You tell me!

The Stupid Box

          This is my name for television. Don't get me wrong! I watch TV. I play video games. I make/watch You Tube videos. I 'm not saying that all TV and entertainment is bad. I just think that TV has to be something you prioritize correctly.
          First, you all know those certain shows, the ones that are so stupid you can feel your IQ shrinking! Yet some people are drawn to them. "It's so stupid, it's hilarious!" Your brain is a computer guys! Input stupid and you'll output stupid! Watch things that are positive and uplifting! Or watch Sci-fi! It's about believing anything is possible!
          Second, most people are in debt. Most people don't live on a budget. If you are in debt, pay that back before you buy cable or satillite! If you are on a tight budget just get Netflix. My husband and I only go to the theaters for two reasons. One is epic films. For example, the soon out new Star Wars. The Second is if we are on a date night for the sake of our marriage. We usually try to save date nights for epic films. Sometimes we buy DVDs and Vudu codes off our friends, but we have a budget for that. We don't even have Netflix, let alone cable.
          Third, you need to limit how many hours you watch TV and play games. When you come home daily and turn on the TV, you lose time. You lose time to pursue your dreams! You lose time with your family! You lose time to work out! Sometimes you get so wrapped up in a show that you think/talk about it at work. Do you really want a show to be your dominating thought!? Or should your vision for the future be your dominating thought!? Do you always want to watch the Discovery Channel or do you want to get out there and discover the world!?

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Vanity is not necessarily a sin!

           Vanity can be a bad thing. It can make you think you are better than others. You can worry too much about how you look instead of how you act. There is no denying that vanity can be a sin. However, a certain amount of vanity alongside good moral values can be a good thing.
          Most of the time vain people are worried about what others think about them. They want the prettiest face, the nicest clothes, the biggest house, and lots of bling and swag! That is the unhealthy type of vanity. These type of vain people are usually arrogant. But deep inside I think that they lack self confidence. I think that is why they are trying to impress others. The other type of vanity is not about impressing others. It is about feeling happy about who you are and then showing it with confidence.
          Healthy vanity is about looking your best. That means being healthy and in shape. People with healthy vanity may want to look good for their spouse or future spouse. But this is not because they lack self confidence. It is because they value their mate and want their mate to have a mate they can be proud to introduce to people. Healthy vanity makes you stay in shape. Staying in shape helps you live a more active life for longer. Healthy vanity makes you dress nice and do your hair/ makeup. It makes you shower and brush your teeth. It makes you eat the right foods. All these things make you feel more confident! Once you establish good habits that make you healthy and confident you teach them to your children. This teaches children to have a good self image.
          Healthy vanity has many positive benefits. It is just one of those things where whether it's a good thing or a bad thing is all about your attitude and thought process! So go out there and be beautiful! It's not being cocky! It's being bold and confident! ;-)   

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Why Resist Being Saved?

It is my own personal belief that many people I know, who are not Christian, run from the idea for a couple of reasons. I will discuss some other reasons later. But today, I want to talk about one reason in particular. This reason is because of their pride. They think they will lose who they are as a person. People who know Jesus well and have had time to grow in their faith, know that this is not true. However, I have seen this fear in my friends. In fact, I once suffered from it!

When I was little, my grandmother told me about God and Jesus. I remember sitting in the floor next to her recliner. She told me that God created me. She said that I was made different from everyone else in the world. That I had certain talents and abilities because God wanted me to do something specific with those abilities. She said that only I could learn what it was He wanted me to do with them. I asked how I was supposed to figure that out. She said that I had to get to know God’s son, Jesus. That through prayer I was able to talk to Jesus. She told me that Jesus would give my messages to God and tell me what God said back. I asked if I would hear Jesus speak. She told me that when I talked to Jesus and when I was in certain situations, that I would just suddenly KNOW what Jesus was telling me. Then she taught me how to say The Lord’s Prayer. She explained what it meant. She also told me an important part of praying was to do two things at the end. The first was to tell God/Jesus a list of of the the things I had for which I was thankful. The second was to ask God/Jesus for good things to happen. We prayed out loud for people who were sick to get better and for people to be happy.

 Once I grew up and moved out on my own, I played with the idea of going to church. I went to certain ones all over town, one time. I told myself they were all hypocrites or weirdos! I saw people who were mature Christians as stuck up or as wierdos that had seizures when they worshipped! I literally went to a service where people got on stage, acted liked they had been possessed, and fell on the floor throwing their body like a rag doll! I thought about calling 911! Then I met a man named Byron Matthews. He was a mature Christian. I thought he was so stuck up! But, I had to keep seeing him because he was also helping me get out of debt. I was in VERY bad financial shape. Byron invited me to his church to see a man speak. He was a huge financial success and was speaking for free. (Of course you could by his books and cds there.) But, it was a rare opportunity to see Peter Daniels! I was there for Peter, but I found a church that actually felt like a home. Try as I may I couldn’t find a fault there, I found pastors that I could love and believe in as people who were just trying to know Jesus like me. That church is where I have been ever since! It's The Rock of Asheville. Here's a link to their website. If this blog post makes sense to you. I highly recommend that you come check out this church!

Later, I was at a business conference. My mindset about money had changed from get out of debt, to live in abundance. My mindset about life, had reverted to what my grandmother had told me about God having something he wanted me to do with my talents and abilities in this life. It was Sunday at the conference and it was a strange town. The leaders of the conference wanted people to be able to go to church without a hassle. So they had a non-denominational service arranged. I went that day and made a decision to get back to a real relationship with God. I understood that I would “become a new person” and that God would “renew my mind.” This is where I had to deal with my pride. I had to understand what “become a new person” and “renew my mind” meant. I thought that they meant that I had to lose who I was. Like my previous self had no worth. That it was so terrible that God wanted to start over with me. To those people who think this, I want you to know, that is absolutely not true! If you think that, you are TOTALLY missing the point!

Think about being saved, or in my case, rededicating your life to Christ, as if you are a computer. Think of God as the manufacturer. God created you. He made you in his image with unique software that is meant to complete a unique task. However, life, circumstances, the devil, maybe even family have been using the computer. They have installed a new operating system. They had downloaded new software. They have tried to get you to comply and complete their tasks. You are just a computer. They have not treated you with respect. They have let you get dusty. They have spilled coffee on your keyboard and made your keys stick. They may have broken a panel door. Or jammed a CD in one of the drives. They have went to bad sites and downloaded viruses. But the saddest part of all of that, is the fact that you have let them be the administrator. Of course, you can’t be blamed too much for that. You were told as long as you can remember that they were in control. You think that is just the way it is. God doesn’t want to change you. He doesn’t think you lack value. He made you. He loves what He created. He is pissed at everyone that has mistreated you! He wants you to see your own value. He wants you to see the vision He had for your life. He wants you to complete the task that He gave you because He knows you are capable! Because He knows that reaching your potential honors the value He built into you. It shows you that He loved you enough to want you to be GREAT! He wants you to become the administrator! He wants you to dust yourself off! He wants you to have pride in who you are and what you were made to do! He wants to “renew your mind.” He wants to clear out the bad operating system and put back the original one! He wants to clear out the viruses and preconceived data! He wants you to have a clarity about the task at hand! He wants to give back the value that the computer had when it was first manufactured!

In dealing with my friends, I have had a hard time making people understand this concept. It’s not that they can’t understand what I am saying. There are two reasons they don’t understand. One is simply because they run from any opportunity where it might come up because of their preconceived thoughts. The other reason is because even if they hear the truth, they may not believe it at first. I didn’t immediately believe. I had to have the courage to allow my self-image to get to a point where I could believe. This is a whole different topic. What I have learned to do with those friends, is to be an example of the way a Christian should really live, to love on them, to give them time to grow their self-image, and lastly to pray for God to reach their hearts!